So today im just finding out that there are 7 hells and 7 heavens and im very confused about this. Why is there 7 hells and 7 heavens? I thought the good go to one heaven and the sinners go to one hell? Why do we get ranked in the after life? Are some people better then others? Are some people worst then others? Is the lowest level of heaven any better then the pretty life we live now? Hows it like in the highest level of heaven? I guess what im trying to say is my perception of the after life was if you completed your dues and achieved good deeds you went to heaven and if you commited sins you went to hell. I didnt know that there is different hells and different heavens. To be honest and real it kind of makes me not even want to try to make it into the highest level but maybe my fellows and allies can help to get me to better understand this and learn more about what my religon is and how i can be a better muslim..
Why do i act the way i do? Thats the question i have been asking myself for many years. I always do something that causes me to ask myself why did i do that. I think im having problems with my ideal and real self and to be honest i need my fellows and allies help with this. As you might know i missed the camping trip because i was arrested with a felony charge. To make a long story short i was out with my friends and acted in a immature way and was arrested. Im so sick of the feeling i get i do something dumb knowing that i will get in trouble and dont realize how bad it is until i get in trouble and then i start feeling bad and my insides clam up. I got to tell you guys its not fun having that stress on your back, it really hurts. Being up all night, having a hard time breathing, just thinking about whats going to happen to you and thats why i decided enough is enough. I have to start making a change in myself and the people around me because obviously im easily influenced. I have decided to open up about this problem im having to you guys because im so sick and tired of getting in trouble with the law and i honestly want to change who i hang out with and the lifestyle i live. I ask all my fellows and allies to please help me out because im almost out of options and i want to better myself to be able to help better the world.
1. I saw a guy who was driving and he exceeded the speed limit, his punishment was he got pulled over and recieved a citation.
2. I studied for my math test so my reward was a pleasant grade.
3. A little boy crossed the street without looking and his punishment was he got spanked by his mother.
4. My friend forgot his window open so his punishment was his car got flooded by the storm.
5. My neighbor forgot to move his car on garbage pick up day his punishment was he recieved a citation.
6. My cousin came home later then his curfew his punishment was he was not allowed to go out the next day.
7. A lady told her dog to sit and he did his reward was a treat.
8. I went to sleep late on tuesday my punishment was i was late to class and was deducted points from my attendance.
9. A girl cursed in front of her mother her punishment was her phone was taken away for a week.
10. My friend messed up on a order
Thursday June 30, 2011 was my first day as a cohort. I really liked the stuff we were doing i think that it will benefit me in alot of ways. The best part of the day was when we read that malcolm x bio. The scary part about it is that same paper we read popped up a couple days before our meeting in my english class at college. I was already very interested in the paper so i asked my teacher if i can keep it and then the same exact paper popped up in our first meeting. I thought that was very weird. I also liked the part when AMEERAH!!! called me out in front of everyone because i was messing around a bit. I think that put me in check lol. Also i thought the debates were really cool even though i wasnt to in them i still was listening. I didnt get to in them because its all like a game in my head i tell myself how can i speak up and debate if i really dont know what the debate has to do with. I cant wait for our next meeting i think i have prepared myself better for this one so
My goals on impacting the world are to educate myself better to be able to prove my point, build lots of close relationships, and to travel the world to share my knowledge and to learn more. This week i went to the libraries in my community and did research on some of the many problems we are having today because i feel in order to stand up and speak about something you have to know what the problem is and what is going on around you in order to be able to speak up about it and to do something about it. One of the things i hate most is people who talk the talk but dont walk the walk. I also have been talking to alot of my friends and neighbors about the fellowship and what we are doing. I also grabbed alot of educational books from the thrift store that i think will help expand my knowledge.
Man the first day at the meetings was really confusing for me. I had no clue what was going on. I somewhat understand it but i have lots of questions for my allies. I think that i just need to understand how everything works a little more so Ameerah im coming to you lol.